Despite the rush to get me to hospital I still had the presence of mind to bring my crystals and talisman with me. Well they were in a bag that also had my wallet and house keys in it, so just had the paramedics to grab that bag to take with me in the ambulance. But for the first day or so I had no access to them cos of me having to lay still on my back.....
So by midday of Day 2 I was left with the terrifying choice of successfully doing a pee while in the impossible position of flat on my back or having the catheter inserted in where catheters nor any other foreign objects should be inserted!!!
And I couldn't pee to save my life. This was the first time in the hospital where I was really afraid. I was not afraid when I was first told I was suffering a heart attack. I was shocked!!! But not afraid. And I was not afraid in the operating theatre. A little apprehensive at first until they told me what was going to happen. Then I knew once the tube is inserted in my artery with the devices I would not feel a thing. It seemed rather... um.... "funny"... to know that there is actually a tube deep inside me doing its work on my heart.... and seeing videocams of my insides on the screens!!!!... but was not afraid. Indeed when I was in my little room the nurses were amazed at how calm I appeared to be. Indeed I was calm, I really was not afraid at all..... until the catheter episode!!!!
Then for the first time I was afraid.... very afraid!!!! They did pump some pain killing substance in but was effective only for the first little bit, not deeper down. Then the tube went in, and it was relatively painless until it hit "something" deeper down.... OUCH!!!! It was pain of magnitude 20 on a scale from 1 to 10, and my chest pain when I called Emergency was on a scale of just 5. I have a high pain threshhold. I don't feel it when I cut myself. I hardly feel needles going into my skin. But this pain was massive!!!! The nurses were surprised when I yelped in extreme pain. For most guys the feelings were simply "uncomfortable" without it being painful, for for me it was painful!!!
And to my horror the nurse couldn't go any deeper, and she couldn't get any urine out!!! This nurse was chosen for the exercise cos she was good at it, she had 100% success rate UNTIL ME!!!!! Trust ME to be the first failure!!! Must be being an 8D soul from Taygeta, my 3D human body would be slightly different!!!
Then a more senior nurse was summoned, and she would try it!!! NO!!! NOT AGAIN!!!!! Her success rate was 100%.... until ME!!!!! OUCH!!! Those medieval torture scenes that you see in movies seemed positively benign in comparison to what I was going through!!!!
So now time for the big guys.... the top nurse from the Urology dept. Up until now it was just the nursing staff in our CCU dept where this catheter exercise is normally routine even if not "comfortable" for the unfortunate males on the other end of this!!!! But for me it was positively torture, me and my 8D Taygeta soul living in a human body that changes slightly!!!!!
And well I don't know if it was some kind of omen, but the woman was dressed in BLACK. The nurses have their dark blue outfits with white, but this woman was dressed totally in BLACK!!! She even had black hair!!! Seemed VERY appropriate!!!! By now I was uttely petrified and I pleaded for NO MORE!!!!! I CAN'T TAKE ANYMORE!!!!! And well normally if a patient is this traumatised then he'd get sedated, however, cos I'm a heart attack patient, they wouldn't sedate me cos of the risks involved.
Well she did have a specialised tube, it was thinner and designed for "difficult" cases like me. The tube actually expands once it was inserted and in place. However no less painful once it hit that spot!!!!!! The worst pain I ever felt. But apparently the tube was thin enough to penetrate past that point.... SUCCESS!!!!!! And I was so relieved to see the urine flowing through the tube, and there was no more pain. However she said for the device to remain in me for 24 hours.... so I'd be attached to a urine bag for 24 hours. But at least the worst was over.....
However given the trauma of the whole episode, I was rather anxious about having it removed when the time came.....
And I was scheduled for another "stent" procedure the next morning.....
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